It’s been quite long since I read Dale Carnegie’s bookHow To Win Friends and Influence People” but its lessons have stuck with me ever since.  With the lessons I learned from this single book, I have gone on to win friends both in the business world and life in general. I have also improved on my business relationship style with my business associates, customers, suppliers and investors alike.

I recently wrote an article titled “How I Overcame my Fear of Public Speaking” and it’s quite important I mention that one of the books that helped me overcome the fear of public speaking was “How To Win Friends and Influence People.” In fact, this book is an all time business/personal development classic.

Now instead of rambling on how “How To Win Friends and Influence People” affected my life and business, as I did with “How Robert Kiyosaki’s Book “Rich Dad Poor Dad” Changed my Life”; I will rather share with you some fundamental rules for winning friends and influencing people from the book “How To Win Friends and Influence People.”

  Dale Carnegie: How to Win Friends and Influence People

Fundamental techniques in handling people

1.            Don’t criticize, condemn or complain

2.            Give honest and sincere appreciation

3.            Arouse in the other person an eager want

Six ways to make people like you

4.            Become genuinely interested in other people

5.            Smile

6.            Remember that person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language

7.            Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves

8.            Talk in terms of the other person’s interest

9.            Make the other person feel important and do it sincerely

How to win people to your way of thinking

10.          The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid

11.          Show respect for the other person’s opinion. Never say “you are wrong.”

12.          If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically

13.          Begin in a friendly way

14.          Get the other person saying “yes, yes” immediately

15.          Let the other person do a great deal of the talking

16.          Let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers

17.          Try honestly to see things from the other person’s point of view

18.          Be sympathetic with the other person’s ideas and desires

19.          Appeal to the nobler motives

20.          Dramatize your ideas

21.          Throw down a challenge

Be a Leader

22.          Begin with praise and honest appreciation

23.          Call attention to people’s mistakes indirectly

24.          Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person

25.          Ask questions instead of giving orders

26.          Let the other person save face

27.          Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. Be hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise

28.          Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to

29.          Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to correct

30.          Make the other person happy about doing the things you suggest

Ajaero Tony Martins