If you are acting a character in a stage play or movie, or you are the main artiste at a concert, then you need to put up your best performance in order to impress your audience and give them value for their money and time. Because you have a lot of eyes and minds fixed on you in that situation, so you need to really care about them.
However, your real life is a different ball game. Although you have a lot of people around you, the truth is they really aren’t paying attention to you as much as you think. Why should they, when you are not on a stage performing for them?
Chances are that you erroneously think other people are watching you closely. You think they are talking about you. You think they are thinking about you and are always busy forming opinions about you. In short, you live your life worrying about what other people think of you.
This mindset makes you spend hours obsessing over how to impress others and how to do things in order not to offend them. But the truth is that you can’t impress everyone. And even if you try to impress others, they really don’t care about you. So, why waste time trying to impress those who don’t give a damn about you?
If you are one of those people who constantly worry about what others think of you, then you need to reverse those unpleasant thoughts and get your thinking in the right direction. The following tips will help you achieve that.
How to Stop Caring What Others Think about You
1. Stop over-thinking
If you want to stop worrying over what people think about you, then you really need to stop thinking about them. The truth is that most other people are also thinking the same. So, they are too occupied with trying to impress you just as you are always busy thinking about how to impress them. In the end, nobody notices others.
Here’s a simple test: Push your limits a little and something that is a bit out of the ordinary for you, and then see how people react. Chances are that only your friends and family will notice the change and make comments about it. But a random stranger won’t care. And that’s enough proof that strangers don’t even notice it when you do things to impress them. Even your family and friends don’t notice positive changes as much as they do negative changes. So, learn to catch and stop yourself whenever you start over-thinking. It only wastes your time.
2. Stop asking others what they think
Asking others what they think about you and your ideas is just a recipe for increased worries. Why should you ask people to comment on what they never noticed in the first place? Most of the time, the best response you can get is flattery. Only people who naturally pay attention to you without you asking them can tell the truth about you and your ideas.
OK, here’s a question for you: How would you response if a stranger just approached you at the park and asked, “Hey dude, what do you think about my dressing?” That’s the same response other people will give you for asking a similar question.
3. Focus on what’s most important
Rather than worry about other people’s thoughts, concentrate on what’s important to you in every situation. If you are giving a speech for instance, rather than worry over what people are thinking about you, focus on the message you are trying to get across.
Similarly, when you are on the hot seat during a job interview, focus on convincing the interviewer that you are the best candidate for the job rather than keep guessing what’s on the interviewer’s mind. The more you focus on the task or the important goals you aim to achieve, the less energy and time you will waste being afraid or worrying.
Lack of confidence is one of the reasons why you are second-guessing yourself. And the only way out of this is to develop strong self-confidence. If you are confident in yourself and your situation, then you will worry less about what others are thinking about you.
You sure would have seen someone who’s wearing something out of the ordinary, but just seems ordinary and isn’t being judged. But if the same person were to wear odd-colored shoes and feel clearly uncomfortable about them, he will certainly be laughed at or blamed.
The rule here is: Blindfold yourself from seeing yourself. If you don’t pre-judge yourself before others do, they will be less likely to judge you in the first place. So, how do you build self-confidence? Smile often and visualize your own success without ever thinking of failing.
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